Our greatest doubters before achieving any goal and dreams are usually the closest people to us such as our family, friends, acquaintances, caregivers, teachers, etc. The doubting starts from childhood when well-meaning family and friends begin to project their fears and insecurities into us by saying things like You cannot do that, it is impossible, people like us cannot do things like that, etc. That early programming and indoctrination sows the seed of our self-doubt early in life and ultimately becomes ingrained in us by adulthood. We settle for less than we are meant to be instead of aiming high, we aim low, instead dreaming, we settle for a life of mediocrity living in quiet desperation, tip-toeing throughout our short existence here on earth.
Following through on your dreams and goals is extremely hard and that is why the majority of us would never attempt it or achieve our dreams. No one can doubt you more than you doubt yourself, doubters would always doubt but the real work is to give room for their doubting and still forge ahead to work on your dreams. If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too. 1 As American transcendentalist and essayist, Henry David Thoreau observed in his essay – Civil Disobedience:
“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. From the desperate city you go into the desperate country, and have to console yourself with the bravery of minks and muskrats. A stereotyped but unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind. There is no play in them, for this comes after work. But it is a characteristic of wisdom not to do desperate things..”
At the root of our self-doubt and the doubting from others is a fear of something: fear of the unknown, success, failure, of standing out or becoming who we were meant to be. Actor Jim Carrey noted in his commencement speech to the Maharishi University of Management’s graduating class of 2014.
So many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality. What we really want seems impossibly out of reach and ridiculous to expect. So we never dare to ask the universe for it.
“Sometimes it’s okay to eat your feelings. Now fear is going to be a player in your life, but you get to decide how much. You can spend your whole life imagining ghosts, worrying about the pathway to the future, but all there will ever be is what’s happening here, and the decisions we make in this moment, which are based in either love or fear. So many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality. What we really want seems impossibly out of reach and ridiculous to expect. So we never dare to ask the universe for it. I’m saying I’m the proof that you can ask the universe for it. Please. And if it doesn’t happen for you right away, it’s only because the universe is so busy fulfilling my order. Party size.”
Fear is going to be a player in your life, but you get to decide how much. You can spend your whole life imagining ghosts, worrying about the pathway to the future, but all there will ever be is what’s happening here, and the decisions we make in this moment, which are based in either love or fear.
Meditations
- Daily Calm with Tamara Levitt – Simplicity
“Truth is ever to be found in simplicity, and not in the multiplicity and confusion of things” — Sir Isaac Newton
- Daily Jay with Jay Shetty – Boxed Cat Thinking
- Cat love boxes. Don’t just stick to a career because it feels safest, stick to the one that brings you alive and makes you thrive. Quit hiding behind an inauthentic personality waiting for the right moment to be you, that moment is now and forever. Allow your curiosity to lead you to new hobbies, experiences, and journeys, you can always return to the box you already know and love. So leap outside of your comfort zones.
All the best in your quest to get better. Don’t Settle: Live with Passion.
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